I’ve been Tagged……

I am so far behind….I was tagged by two people and haven’t answered either one……so I am going to try to knock those out of the way……If memory will serve me on the one tag….

The first tag is from the DEEZONE. She is really nice. Here goes…

**Four things I was doing 10 years ago….**

1. Hmmm I had just gotten the cast on my right foot breaking it the week we closed on our house.

2. I got the cast off of my right foot 2 weeks before the 4th of July.

3. I broke my left ankle on the 4th of July in D.C. falling down the steps of the Jefferson memorial. We had only been there half an hour. We caught the fireworks as we were heading home from D.C. on I95.

4. That was a bad summer. I got blamed for breaking ankle so I could ruin everyones summer (IL’s). That was a bad year. Let’s skip the rest of that one.

**Four things I was doing 5 years ago….**

1. I started cleaning the Christian school my now three kids were attending to cover tuition.

2. My friend has surgery so I was now cleaning the church and the school.

3. Started to become ill due to an unknown allergy to the chemicals used for cleaning.

4. Okay…that was another bad year. (IL’s) Mother’s Day, Birthday, Anniversary were ruined. This is not turning out so well for me….Hmm something happy. Nope can’t think of anything.

** Four things I am doing this year….**

1. Now this has been an interesting year. Of major importance was finding a friend that I lost touch with after 32 years. We were 12 years old. Or was that last year…..Hmmm doesn’t matter it has carried over.

2. Getting my house in order, slowly but surely.

3. Spending alot of time with my children.

4. Working on a book.

**Four things I did yesterday….**

1. I cleaned house now that my bathroom is back together.

2. Visited with a friend who is leaving me….( She’s moving to Alabama..)

3. Praised my kids for all the hard work they did yesterday.

4. We had my Father-in-Law over for dinner.

**Four shows I like….***

1. This will be tricky since we don’t have a television per se. But if I watch online…I like NCIS.

2. Bones

3. Discovery Channel

4. Animal Planet as long as they are not doing a show on Arachnids.

**Four biggest joys of the moment….**

1. This one I can do….is how God has been working in my life lately. It is exciting to have ones eyes opened and knowing that He is here with me.

2. My husband…as a person, as a man, as a Christian. He is a joy (most of the time….Just kidding Honey.)

3. My three children….watching their eyes being opened to the things around them. Hearing their laughter and talking with them.

4. My FIL came over and had dinner with the family yesterday.

Now I am supposed to TAG four people…..ahh the choices.

• Warren of The Imponderable One…I like his sense of Humor and his would be interesting to say the least.

• Colleen the Birdwhisperer….My daughter. She likes doing these things.

• Michielle aka Celtic Muse….to annoy her with something else to do to break up the monotony of unpacking all those boxes she has been working on since she moved into her new house…..okay…long sentence I know.

• Sherri…well because she is an interesting person. I thought I would tag someone different this time.

You are not required to participate……but you’ve been tagged none the less…..Thank you for participating if you choose to do so.

Oops….I forgot….the second tag came from my Canadian friend Birdy….I will write that one up and it will be posted tomorrow. That will mean coming up with 4 new people…..Thinking….

God trusts us with our trials…….

My daughter and I attended a Mother/Daughter banquet at one of my former foster parents church. Pastor McGee is now Pastor Emeritus and his son is the current pastor. They were my legal guardians for almost 2 years.

It has always been a little confusing to the kids as to just who my “parents” are since I have so many surrogate families. I have three families. These three families have been greatly used by God in my life to give me insight into what a family actually is besides the dysfunctional and abusive ones I grew up in. God showed me what a family is like that makes Him head of the home. That marriages can be kind and kids do not need to be beat bloody for eating a bowl of cereal. You can read more on my testimony by going to the ME page.

The McGee’s were one of those families. Living with them also gave me some insight on what it is like to be a pastor’s kid. I saw firsthand how a church will sometimes hold the pastor and his family up to a microscope and what a fine line the Pastor walks in juggling the role of Pastor, Husband and Parent. As an aside….pray for and love your Pastor and his family. They need this daily uplifting in prayer. They face the same issues and problems that we face….ours just aren’t as open for everyone to witness.

What I wanted to share was the devotion brought that night by Mrs Becky Calvert. She is the wife of Pastor Troy Calvert and together they minister at Fairfax Baptist Temple in Fairfax,VA. I know the church and knew the reputation of his father Dr. Bud Calvert. Our schools have some lively competition during ODACS each year. (Old Dominion Assoc of Christian Schools). Mrs Calvert sang and played the piano along with her daughter who also played the violin. She also has cd’s that are available if you are interested in music that is uplifting and a blessing.

Mrs Calvert spoke some about an accident she was in ten years ago. I remember that our church (Heritage Baptist Church) was one of many asked to pray for the family. She wasn’t expected to survive, her injuries were so severe. She gave a wonderful testimony as to how God brought her through that time and the healing it took. She praised God for the many churches and missionaries that were also busy praying for the family. She also spoke on how God was able to use that time as a ministry and an opportunity to share about God’s power and healing.

It was one particular statement that she made that reached out to my heart. God turned the light bulb on for me. I was stunned and excited to think of what she was saying. I shared that thought with my husband and he laughed at me. He looked at me a little stunned that I had never thought of this before.

Update on “I cried”

I talked to my husband and he helped me see that I may have overreacted. I also spoke to the person.

I apologized for assuming what may have not been meant. They reassured me that no…they were in earnest. They also felt that when they hung up from speaking with me that they didn’t handle their end of the conversation well.

I cried again of course. They know my history and understood my feeling and need of acceptance. They are wonderful people but I have always tried not to assume when people offer because my history has always lent itself to the invitation not being sincere.

We were both glad that I called and it was good for me. God has been so good to me and has blessed my life in so many ways that I feel guilty at times for wanting more.

More than for me though, I wanted this for my children. I have been on the search for and praying for a set of surrogate Grandparents. We all ready have one set that the kids love spending time with. They are truly Godly people and love my children even though they are not really their grandparents. They treat them no differently then their own biological children. We live so far away . I just wish that we could visit them more often.

On another note…….

I Cried……

I cried…..now to some that is not such a big ordeal, for me, it is enough to get marked on the calendar. Why? I trained myself to not cry. I had years of training and discipline. It was simply a matter of not allowing the person beating me to also have the satisfaction of knowing they made me cry. I did an excellent job of it if I might say so……I did such a good job that when I cry….everyone is alarmed.

It was something that was said to me today…..I may have read more into the comment or hesitation then was meant….I started to dwell on the conversation. I tried to remember each nuance, each pause and thought to myself that maybe the other person was just being kind.

I started to cry. It was in those few brief moments that I felt so alone. This is not the type of loneliness one feels just because there is no one present to talk with or in my case in the correct time zone that I felt comfortable calling and bawling on their shoulder through the phone. This was a soul deep aloneness. The type of aloneness that one feels in total abandonment.

Honesty….a rare virtue in these days.

It amazes me that when you are honest, people look at you strangely. That or they are so surprised they don’t know what to say to you.

Two examples:

We went to Sams and bought new mattresses for the kids beds. I had all ready done the math in my head so I knew what our bill should have been at the checkout. The young person rang us up and we paid. I stood there looking at the receipt because I knew something was wrong by $200. I told the clerk that the receipt was wrong and he had made a mistake. He became a little defensive. I am sure they get more of the “You overcharged me” then someone telling him he undercharged on the ticket. He didn’t realize that the MOD (Manager on Duty) had just stepped up behind him as we were explaining the problem. We told him it was short. We gave him back the receipt to double check and his jaw dropped. He apologized and I told him that I was glad we caught the mistake. It was a mistake. I would hate to see his job in jeopardy over this. His MOD told him he was lucky we were honest. She was even surprised….we could have walked out with that mattress and no one would have been the wiser. The person checking receipts that day was not someone who would have picked up on the extra mattress or would have assumed it was part of a set.