Someone out there has a sense of humor…Part II

I did it. I called the doctor and got an appointment for Thursday…..We have Kaiser. When calling Kaiser you have to call the appointment line in order to schedule said appointment.

Not a problem…..unless they can’t help you. They have criteria they must follow when receiving certain calls. The procedure is that you are transferred to the Advice Nurse who will then do a sudo triage over the phone. This determines whether or not you come in right now or you can wait and if any lab work needs to be done prior to the appointment. Certain appointments are kept locked up and only the advice nurse can free up that time slot. I’m sure that is basic with most HMO’s.

I get transferred to the advice nurse………….as you know, my recent problem is dealing with a delicate feminine issue. I have had my monthly cycle going on 4 weeks. It pains me to see that in black and white.

When the voice came across the line, I was a little speechless and replied …”Oh, that figures!!” …I was really hoping I hadn’t said that out loud…but the next comment made me realize that,”Yes…I did say that out loud . It wasn’t in my head”…..I am groaning at this point. Then I heard this deep, almost “Barry White” sounding masculine voice say, “Excuse Me??”

Of all the days to get a male advice nurse ,figures it would be today. I would have overlooked the fact that I was speaking to the “Male Advice Nurse” any other time but “Oh Please God, not today…not with this.” If you were ever in doubt…..God does have a sense of humor.

The questions were not easy to answer…I’m sure he was as uncomfortable asking them as I was answering them…..He tried to speak with as little emotion in his voice as possible. while I was trying to be as discreet as possible with out being gross.

The questions ranged from a description of the flow, length of time, was I using a panty liner or a regular pad. I don’t think I really need to go into details regarding the questions. Use your imagination, there were several that left me stumbling over my words.

Anyone who has spoken to me over the phone knows that doesn’t happen often if at all!! I am groaning in my head with each response. We made it thru the triage questions and he scheduled the blood work to be done and the appointment. This all took place at 10:00 this morning.

There was some confusion over the appointment. Kaiser called back this afternoon, around 4:00. The nurse,(female this time) sheepishly asks me if she can ask an unusual question. She goes on to clarify that they are not used to scheduling appointments for males and was there some reason that Charles P*****, age 11 needed an OBGYN apppointment. I started laughing.

I new what had happened. While I was trying to get my appointment, I was having to reschedule Charlie’s allergy appointment. Some how he ended up with both appointments.

The nurse said, that appointment had the whole floor rolling….I said that I could see why, considering he lacked the proper plumbing required for an OBGYN visit, to which she replied, they didn’t have the proper instruments either….something about the speculum?

I just didn’t know what to say to any of this today……I guess I could have requested a female nurse….but I figured “Barry” chose this profession, “Barry” could deal with it.


April 25, 2007 - Posted by | Humor, Just Life, Medical, Observances


  1. Oh My Goodness! Ginger I am rolling! That is hilarious…I’m laughing with you, of course! I can’t believe you had to explain all that to a male nurse! And then he booked an OB appt. for Charlie. Too funny~!

    Comment by missplacedalaskan | April 25, 2007 | Reply

  2. If he hadn’t had such a deep masculine voice…It probably wouldn’t have been so difficult. It was like trying to tell the “Marlboro Man” you are not having a happy period!! (I hate that commercial)

    Oh my…some of the questions….were beyond belief…I thought about them and explaining this to another women would have been no problem….But…ewww. It was hard controlling my voice and trying not to sound flustered…

    Looks like everyone got a good laugh today….I thought it was funny after the call….but not while going thru the call.

    Comment by gingerporter | April 25, 2007 | Reply

  3. ROFL!! Oh, Ginger! “Barry” must have been pretty rattled to book your OB appt for Charlie. 😆

    I’m not quite sure how I would have handled it. I probably would have just laughed and been blunt enough to say, “This is going to be uncomfortable for both of us.” 😆 (Or, hung up and tried later. 😳 😆 )

    I pray that they can find an answer for you, and that it’s nothing serious. :hug:

    Comment by Tresses | April 25, 2007 | Reply

  4. Oh, I’m so sorry, but that is soooo funny.
    And the OB/GYN having an appt made for Charlie…
    I bet they were so confused.
    Poor Male nurse, I’m sure he was asking every woman he had to speak to if it was OB/GYN related…as to not have to deal w/ that again. Can you imagine what color of red he was?

    Comment by Maria | April 26, 2007 | Reply

  5. Does Charlie know that you scheduled him for an OBGYN appointment???


    Comment by chocolatechic | April 26, 2007 | Reply

  6. Oh Yeah….He just doesn’t understand the significance of it…but Randy did….I explained to him it was doctor that specifically sees women.

    Comment by gingerporter | April 26, 2007 | Reply

  7. LOL! That is so funny! That sounds like something I would do.


    Comment by jodysgirl94 | April 27, 2007 | Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: