Hello World…I’m new here…
That is what I feel like I should be writing. I have not wanted to write. I consider myself a tad on the boring side here lately. I am not always boring. Something always seems to happen to me. I also figured there was nothing really worth telling.
My sister had her bum operated on. It was a little more than that though and I really should not make light of it. Hemorroids are a nasty blight to the pregnant women. Apparently hers were such that they also had to perform plastic surgery on her…um…bum. Too much loose skin was the reason my other sister gave…How can anyone possibly say this and keep a straight face?! I really shouldn’t say anymore because I am about to get myself in a whole heep of trouble. My other sister di say she had to …um…check down there for the one who had the surgery. Well….it looks like a …bum.
My other sister had to have surgery. Nothing particularly funny about hers though. Well…there was one comment made that I know absolutely thrilled her since everyone is always mistaking her for being the oldest and me the younger of the two. The volunteer never even looked up. How would she know if my sister walked in with a friend, sister or motherly type?! She would not have known! She looks at my sister and asks, “Is this your mother with you today?” I promptly set the women straight. I informed her that no, I was the sister. We found a seat and my sis turns to me and has the temerity to reply (Don’t forget the ear to splitting ear grin on her face. I know you can picture it!) “Wow! I must look really young today?” My reply? “Hrrump! That or I am looking really old today!” In my defense, I had not gotten any sleep that night. I know I looked rough. The teenager in the house had one of those annoying fake programmable babies that the school must have programmed on hard and colicky!! I swear that thing was up crying every hour…on the hour…I am sure of it!! My sister did look up at me from her gurney after she had been prepped for surgery, and said “Thank you. You always get stuck with the yucky jobs.” Warm moment here folks….Aaahhhhhh. I think I will beg to differ on that one.
I did not have to look at someone’s bum that just had hemorrhoids removed and their you know what re-puckered. I am so sorry…but I had to say it. I could not help it. I know it is crude and I am also sorry to that sister for sharing this (she doesn’t like me anyway… got that bit from our mother this week) but it is funny!! It was funny to hear my other sister describe the whole scene. Okay…enough on that one.
I have done some really stupid things of late. One of the stupidest was going back and listening to some messages I shouldn’t have listened to. I forgot how horrible they were and what affect they had on me emotionally. It is amazing that just hearing someone’s voice can put fear and terror in your heart. NOT. DOING. THAT. AGAIN!!!! I really mean it and I promise. It wasn’t worth the pain it caused.
My mother is in Ohio with my brother. She is of course demanding to be brought home. Today I was reminded that I didn’t help someone because they didn’t ask me for help. I guess a person shouldn’t have to ask for help, it should be offered.
I really need to be remade into an octopus. Then just think of all the arms people would have to pull on then….
I was trying to keep this light and funny….I started out well, but , then I sneezed. Sneezing at my age after having children…It doesn’t work right anymore.
I did learn something funny today. My friends husband went out to dinner with some guys at work. He told the guys he would have to check with the SWMBO (No that is not a typo!) Once they got up the nerve to ask they wanted to know what a SWMBO was….I love it!!
She Who Must Be Obeyed
I got the hugest tickle out of that one. I had never heard it before today. I guess the male version is HWMBO.
Have a lovely day…Smile…you never know who is going to be watching you…..
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